Today, I rose and wore the best smile. Perhaps the widest one. I could guarantee you that. Because last night I broke the silence with a silent wail. And sobbing at the end of the line. I wish I could hold it inside. But I slumped in pain, and just couldn't hide it. I failed.
Supposed, I called to ease her. To sooth her. To tell her it's alright to be sad and cry. Because no force on earth that can stop her from expressing her own feeling. Your feeling is awarded specially from Him. But I wasn't that strong to hear her grief. I broke once again. I failed.
Who says I'm unhappy? Yes, you may noticed my tears yesterdays. You may feel disgusted for my weariness. But if it happens yesterday, why should I drag it here today? I left it, shouldn't I let it go? I believe it happens for a reason. Everything. So if today is a brand new day, then it must be a brand new me. I won't cry over my past. Because I live forward. And death is up ahead. And waiting for me.
But today, once again. The usual sight. Too much stories. Too much mystery. Last night was a soreness night. Yet so starry to others. But who cares if the beautiful sight can be seen by everyone but me. Because I love them. I truly love them. It's my job to make them happy. Even when I failed to feel it, sometimes I managed to share it.
For five years, each day and each night I convince myself to be strong. Because if I don't, then who will? Everyone got their own problems to be solved. If I object my bravery, then how can I tell myself to stay calm? So I decided to be strong. Strong enough to handle everything on my own. Alhamdulillah, with all His might, He helps me to stay strong. And finally I'm no longer the weak person I used to be years ago.
Why I'm so sure that I can be that strong? Because I grow in pain. I watched painful things. I listened to painful words. Till when should I rely on others? I believe, if it's not me to help myself when I'm alone, then who will? He's there. He's always there. He's with me. And He'll always be.
So peeps, here's some advice.
You may sleep with tears, but please wake up with smiles.
Because when the situation gets rough, it feels better to just to think, you're going to be just fine.
Be strong everyone. May Allah ease everything for us. InsyaAllah.
Supposed, I called to ease her. To sooth her. To tell her it's alright to be sad and cry. Because no force on earth that can stop her from expressing her own feeling. Your feeling is awarded specially from Him. But I wasn't that strong to hear her grief. I broke once again. I failed.
Who says I'm unhappy? Yes, you may noticed my tears yesterdays. You may feel disgusted for my weariness. But if it happens yesterday, why should I drag it here today? I left it, shouldn't I let it go? I believe it happens for a reason. Everything. So if today is a brand new day, then it must be a brand new me. I won't cry over my past. Because I live forward. And death is up ahead. And waiting for me.
But today, once again. The usual sight. Too much stories. Too much mystery. Last night was a soreness night. Yet so starry to others. But who cares if the beautiful sight can be seen by everyone but me. Because I love them. I truly love them. It's my job to make them happy. Even when I failed to feel it, sometimes I managed to share it.
For five years, each day and each night I convince myself to be strong. Because if I don't, then who will? Everyone got their own problems to be solved. If I object my bravery, then how can I tell myself to stay calm? So I decided to be strong. Strong enough to handle everything on my own. Alhamdulillah, with all His might, He helps me to stay strong. And finally I'm no longer the weak person I used to be years ago.
Why I'm so sure that I can be that strong? Because I grow in pain. I watched painful things. I listened to painful words. Till when should I rely on others? I believe, if it's not me to help myself when I'm alone, then who will? He's there. He's always there. He's with me. And He'll always be.
So peeps, here's some advice.
You may sleep with tears, but please wake up with smiles.
Because when the situation gets rough, it feels better to just to think, you're going to be just fine.
Be strong everyone. May Allah ease everything for us. InsyaAllah.
p/s : 5 years of friendship won't be destructed by distance :')
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